Dwain Northey (Gen X)

Ah yes, the good old patriarchy—because obviously, nothing says “efficient leadership” like centuries of wars, economic collapse, and fragile egos running the show. We’ve been letting men steer this ship for millennia, and wow, what a job they’ve done. Climate change? Check. Global inequality? Check. Still arguing about whether women deserve rights? Big fat check.

But sure, let’s keep pretending that testosterone-fueled pissing contests are the pinnacle of governance.

Let’s be real: if the world had been run by women all along, we might actually have universal healthcare, functioning schools, and, I don’t know, peace. Matriarchies tend to be more cooperative and community-oriented—crazy, right? Imagine prioritizing education and empathy over nukes and oil.

“But men are natural leaders,” some guy yells from the back while failing to load a dishwasher. Right, buddy. Meanwhile, women have been managing families, careers, emotional labor, and literal childbirth without burning everything to the ground. But no, let’s keep handing the keys to guys who think empathy is a weakness and emotions are “hormonal issues.”

It’s not that men are inherently bad leaders—plenty are great—it’s just that the patriarchal model assumes they must lead, and often at the expense of everyone else. Maybe, just maybe, it’s time we tried something else. A matriarchal system might focus on sustainability, equity, and not destroying everything for profit. Wild concept, huh?

So yeah, maybe the next time we’re picking leaders, we should look for someone who doesn’t measure success in missiles and quarterly profits. If nothing else, let’s at least admit the patriarchy isn’t the flawless masterpiece it claims to be. Honestly, at this point, letting grandmas run the world sounds like our best shot.