Dwain Northey (Gen X)

Essay: Lucy, the Football, and the Democratic Delusion

Well, congratulations, America — the grand tradition of Democrats falling for the same tired Republican routine continues. The government shutdown has come to a screeching, humiliating end, not with a roar of moral victory, but with the soft whimper of eight Democratic caucus members caving under the familiar weight of “promises.” Promises from Republicans, no less — the same people who would swear on a stack of Bibles they’ll “discuss” healthcare reform and subsidies for the ACA, and then promptly ghost the moment the ink dries.

Honestly, it’s the political equivalent of watching Charlie Brown once again believe that Lucy won’t yank the football away. You want to scream, “Don’t do it! Not this time!” But there they go, running full speed ahead, brimming with naïve hope and an unshakable belief in bipartisan good faith — and then, wham! flat on their backs, staring up at the sky wondering how it happened again.

Let’s be clear: Republicans didn’t promise reform. They didn’t promise protection. They promised to “discuss.” And “discuss” in GOP-speak means “we’ll hold a hearing, leak a headline, then bury the issue under another round of tax cuts for billionaires.” It’s a tried and true act, and yet Democrats — the party that prides itself on heart, empathy, and decency — keep playing straight into the hands of people who see empathy as weakness and decency as a punchline.

What’s truly maddening is that we’ve been here before. Time after time, Republicans weaponize crisis — whether it’s the debt ceiling, a government shutdown, or access to basic healthcare — and Democrats rush in to save the day, believing that if they just act reasonably, the other side will follow suit. Spoiler alert: they never do. The GOP doesn’t deal in good faith. They deal in chaos, manipulation, and delay tactics, all while Democrats keep bringing compromise to a knife fight.

So yes, the government will reopen, agencies will resume their work, and somewhere in the Capitol, a few smug Republicans are clinking glasses, toasting how easily Democrats can be bought off with vague promises of “future talks.” Meanwhile, the rest of us are left watching the rerun of a political sitcom where the punchline is always the same: the Democrats believed them again.

If history is any indicator — and it always is — those “discussions” about the ACA and subsidies will evaporate faster than a campaign promise in August. And when the next crisis comes (because it will), Lucy will be there again, holding that shiny football, smiling sweetly, saying, “Trust me this time.”

And tragically, someone will.