Dwain Northey (Gen X)

How did we get here? It’s the kind of question usually reserved for waking up in a strange Airbnb with a waffle iron in the shower, not for contemplating the functioning of a constitutional republic. And yet here we are, clutching our civic participation like a stress ball, congratulating ourselves for finally paying attention to government—roughly two centuries after it would have been most helpful.

Of course, the upside is that Americans are more engaged than ever. We’re watching hearings, learning procedural rules, and discovering that “oversight” is not just what happens when you forget to proofread an email. The downside is that the content of this newfound engagement appears to be an Attorney General confidently explaining to Congress that obvious contradictions are actually sophisticated truths, and that the real issue is not the answers given under oath but the audacity of the questions themselves. It’s a bold legal theory: perjury by inquiry.

There’s something almost admirable about the efficiency of it all. Why bother resolving facts when you can simply redefine reality as a hostile witness? Why wrestle with accountability when you can file a motion to dismiss common sense? It streamlines governance into a tidy loop—deny, deflect, accuse, repeat—saving everyone the trouble of pretending outcomes depend on evidence.

Still, perhaps this is progress. After all, democracy does require participation, and nothing motivates citizens quite like the slow realization that the adults in the room are arguing over whether gravity is partisan. If this is what it takes to get people to watch a congressional hearing without falling asleep, maybe confusion is just the new civic virtue.

So yes, it’s amazing we’ve reached this point in our history. Not the inspiring, statue-worthy kind of amazing—more the “how is this possibly happening in real time” variety. But take heart: future generations will surely study this era closely, if only to confirm that satire, at some point, officially gave up and filed for early retirement.